Ben Schelker’s 100 More Reasons to Stay on Earth for Now

Ben Schelker’s 100 More Reasons to Stay on Earth for Now

(Originally appeared in Mutant Renegade Zine)
Ben Schelker created this list in 1993, unfortunately he passed away due to an accident in 1997. Still a great list for any year!

100. Satanism freaks out Bible Thumpers
99. Fresh vegetables in the Summer
98. Mountain Dew
97. Chuck Taylor’s
96. Pez
95. All night diners
94. Loud S.G.’s
93. Brooklyn Lager
92. Midgets
91. James Brown “In the Jungle Groove”
90. Staying out all night
89. Tea and bagels
88. “Hate” by Peter Bagge
87. Acid house parties
86. Old AC/DC
85. Reds and Yankees games
84. Stir fry
83. Good pizza
82. Jagermiester
81. Jalapenos
80. The desire to rip out Mariah Carey’s voice box.
79. Robert Johnson
78. Free samples at the supermarket
77. Illegal fireworks
76. Winnona Ryder
75. Buffalo wings
74. Girls in bands
73. Quadrophenia
72. Road trips
71. The third time the cops show up
70. Bowling
69. Ren & Stimpy
68. Girls in bands
67. Skull candles
66. Bob’s wine store
65. Being in a rock band
64. Whole days off
63. Friends who like you, even if you are annoying
62. New York
61. Free Beer
60. Krazy Kats
59. Sex (Safe of course)
58. Mystery Science Theatre 3000
57. Girls in bands
56. Throwing water bombs
55. Husker Du
54. I am the master of all humans
53. Pat Joneses Simpson’s quotes
52. Dijon mustard
51. Youngs dairy
50. The Little Rascals
49. The Fifth Street Deli
48. Buying albums
47. Road riot
46. Breaking beer bottles
45. Johnette Napolitano
44. St. Louis Art Museum
43. Macaroni and cheese with cream cheese
42. House of Magic on Brown Street
41. Alfred Hitchcock movies
40. Canal Street Tavern
39. New guitar strings
38. Slip and slides
37. Looking at old photos
36. Pixie sticks
35. The Pixies
34. Smashing puppies with baseball bats
33. Milk
32. Freaking people out by saying things like #34
31. Beer battered Onion Rings
30. Dirty Larry Crazy Mary
29. Wine
28. Sneaking into the good seats
27. Animal House (without dumb jocks around)
26. Clean socks
25. Michelinas frozen dinners
24. Onion dip
23. Waking up and realizing you can go back to sleep
22. Pink Panther movies
21. Girls in bands
20. Free lunches
19. Grocery shopping
18. Getting drunk and dancing around to old disco albums
17. The fact that I don’t need a PAP smear
16. A full tank of gas
15. Calvin and Hobbes
14. Kabobs
13. The Who
12. When it’s not your turn to do the dishes
11. Driving really fast with Motorhead on
10. St, Louis art museum
9. Pete’s Wicked Ale
8. John Zhorn
7. Star Wars
6. Fir
5. Bob Marley
4. Bob, Doug and the Great White North
3. Operation Ivy
2. “Sticky Fingers” by the Rolling Stones
1. I will probably live longer than Ronald Reagan

1993 Ben Schelker (R.I.P)

468 ad

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>